An Amusing Passage

I was going through some of my older stories and I stumbled upon one I started writing when I was fifteen called First Love, True Lies. It's actually a kind of funny romance (a far cry from what I usually write, yes), about a girl who keeps falling for guys too old for her and lying about her age. It was pretty funny actually and I'd really like to go back and finish it someday, but I was reading over it and a certain part caught my eye.

Keep in mind, I wrote this in 1999.

“I've finally figured it out, Kim,” she was saying as I searched my locker for my finished Economics homework.

“What?” I muttered absentmindedly, digging through the growing pile of papers in the bottom of the locker.

“Today's fashion,” she went on. “What they don't want you to know.”

“Discovered another conspiracy, Bethie?” I asked. There was my math homework. So the economics stuff had to be somewhere close by.

“Exactly. A few years ago those baggy pants hanging down your ass was the biggest thing ever. But the school boards outlawed them.”

I could see it! There was a piece of the damn paper hanging out way up from the tip top shelf. If I could just reach it...

Dean must've stuck it up there, I thought. Dean was the best friend of my locker partner and loved to make my life miserable. I fixed my feet on the bottom inside of the locker and tried for the paper.

“So then the fashion people didn't know what to do. Here they had all these years worth of baggy pants to sell but their prime market couldn't wear them to school. They were in deep shit. So they came up with the bright idea to just recycle fashion from the sixties, and they'll keep going till they get back to the nineties and start again.”

“That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.” Just one inch further. “I got it!” I squealed, just as I slipped and hurled back onto the cold cold floor. My English book and stacks and stacks of papers poring out on top of me.

“But I got it,” I said proudly holding the paper towards her, noticing that it had torn and a large chunk of it was sitting caught in the hinge. “Dammit.”

“Were you even listening to me?” she moaned.

I noticed the stares now and decided to get up. “Will you help me stick my stuff back in there.”

“You are truly hopeless, you know that?”

“You keep telling me. It oughtta stick someday.”

“So,” I went on as we piled the papers back into the locker. “If they keep recycling styles and get to the eighties,does that mean guys will dress in tight leather pants and have hair a mile high?”

“I'd like to see Jake like that,” Beth giggled.

“I can see Marty and Dean dressed like that.”

“Hairspray.”

“Heals.” We both giggled like mad at the last one.

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Guess Beth was right. :p